If you start thinking about an incident that happened on May 10, 1971 at 4:36 pm (or even something that happened last week) and you experience some of these symptoms, it might be time to let go:
· Your back stiffens up
· Your emotional walls go up
· Your migraine visits
· Your mouth becomes a sewer – with ‘fa fa’ words flowing freely
· Your forehead veins pop out
· Your mood intensifies
· Your face breaks out
· Your palms sweat
· Your blood pressure rises
· Your heart races
· Your stomach starts to gurgle
· Your teeth clench
· Your hands make a fist
· Your voice starts to get louder and goes up 3 octaves
· Your face resembles a ripe tomato or beet
· Your pulse is visible
· Your body shakes
· Your tone gets snippy
I often thought that letting go meant I was letting person that hurt me off the hook for what they did. If I let it go or forgave them I was saying it was okay that they did what they did. I actually thought it was a good thing and assured myself that holding on to my anger made me stronger and less weak.
Meanwhile, while I’m aggravated thinking of every little detail of the incident, all this unpleasant stuff is happening to my body. Simultaneously, the person I’m upset with is eating a sandwich – not an ounce of thought coming my way.
Guess this explains why forgiving and letting go is a favor you do for yourself, not for the other person. For peace of mind, mental health and living a positive lifestyle, it’s in my best interest to let it go. How on earth is raising my blood pressure affecting the other person?
Didn’t say it was easy, but it is something loving you can do for yourself. When something happens and you become upset, feel it. The hurt, the anger, the sadness, the disappointment, the frustration. Do what you have to do: punch a pillow, vent to a friend, run down the street screaming (make sure you watch out for cars), get on the elliptical machine, take a long soothing bath, have a good cry, listen to loud music – whatever works for you. Sometimes writing your honest thoughts in a journal can help. Try anything in a balanced, healthy way to release the frustration. Feel what you need to feel until it’s out of your system. If you find yourself getting irritated later on, take a deep breath and release it. Release until you don’t give it a second thought.
Stuff happens in life and it is for our own benefit to let go. Just think how much money you’ll save on dental work!